Tender Leadership

Austin Gardner • April 15, 2023

Gentle men lead gently

Many of us were born and raised in a very authoritarian environment. As a child, I was told repeatedly, as were many children of the day, “Children are to be seen and not heard.” Being harshly scolded was normal.



Teachers were not like those today. Preachers preached hard messages where they hung you out over hell on a rotting rope, or so goes the story. I had a teacher who would draw a circle on the blackboard and make a disobedient student stand on his tiptoes to put their nose in the circle. The teacher swatted them every time they lowered their foot to the ground.


Another teacher said you do not graduate from this school with the good grace of God and then the teacher’s name.

Then, many of us became pastors and preachers and let too much of our past affect how we treated the people God gave us to lead.


Jesus wants us to lead on softly and tenderly. We thought we were because we were so much softer than those that raised us, but much of the love was not there. The tenderness and the encouragement were lacking.


We should have realized that you can’t treat everyone the same. People need gentle, loving guidance. Over the years, I have failed dramatically by acting so harshly. I know you do not want to make this mistake. I challenge you to lead on softly.


I wanted something different from how I was trained. I tried to be different, but failed miserably.


So let me remind you we treat them like our brothers or sisters or mothers or dads. Let’s forgive each other and step forward for the honor and glory of Jesus.


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