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Scared my dad!

Austin Gardner • Aug 07, 2022

like the Clampetts from the "Beverly HillBillies,

versión en español a continuación


You will remember how much and how quickly my dad loved Betty. Within hours of meeting her, he wanted me to marry her. He would often say to me, "well, not everyone is married to a Betty!' he thought till the day he died that she was one of the best women on the planet.


When Betty was on the farm, she was perfect. She fit in. She never seemed to look down on us though we were so different, cultured city girl versus the hillbilly redneck! Betty didn't act superior. 


For Sunday breakfast before church, we always ate cereal served in "serving bowls!" She had never seen anything like it. The amount of food prepared and served blew her mind. 


My family was very loud and boisterous. Loud discussions, arguments, laughing, and just crazy people filled the house, people constantly coming and going. There were animals to care for everywhere, chickens, pigs, cows, horses, and rabbits. Milking the cow by hand in the early morning and then at the end of the day. Betty fit in.


So the Gardners, like the Clampetts from the "Beverly HillBillies," were invited to visit the Ferguson home in Roswell, Georgia. 


We had plenty of tractors, trailers, equipment, and trucks. The new car, the latest model car we didn't have. We had only lived in a house with running water and indoor plumbing for less than three years.


We arrived at the Ferguson house. Dad and I were in the same car. He told me he was sorry. He had made a mistake. There was no way I could marry a rich girl like Betty. I would never make enough money to keep her in makeup. 


The light fixtures in the house blew his mind. The size of the house blew our minds. Never mind that when they set the table, there were several forks, knives, spoons, and even plates for every person. 


In our house, "big forks," we called them, were for adults. "Small forks" were for children. We had never seen so many pieces of silverware. Country people said it was like they were showing off, putting on airs. 


Don't even consider that Betty's bedroom was the size of half our house, and she had her private bathroom, a separate dressing room, and a walk-in closet. 


Don't forget Dad had stepped up and built a house with indoor plumbing and a bathroom, but more than one was excessive. 


It was too much. Dad said I like her, but you probably should get out of this marriage any way you can. You will never live up to them.


He would later recant when he found how frugal Betty was. She was hard-working, humble, kind, sweet, gracious, and all he had first thought. But we did have us "a scare" there at the meeting of the Fergusons and the Gardners.


The first lesson I call your attention to is how much my dad loved me and wanted the best for me in my marriage. Every parent wants that. If you are a teen and you are angry with your parents for interfering with your finding true love, I think you are making a big mistake.


For every parent, I challenge you to understand that they are beginning to feel like adults, and you still want to treat them like children. Understand them and remember you were in their place at one time. Help them through this stage of life. Love them. 


Betty's experience with more money and comfort than me in no way indicated anything of her character. She was willing and able to adapt and do whatever was needed for us to serve God. Watch the one you are considering. How selfish are they? How demanding are they? How much whining do they do? Are they willing to be a servant? 


The last little lesson is that you can learn and grow no matter what happened in your background or past. There is no reason to allow your history to hinder your future. It is not how you were hurt or raised but how you deal with it that will make the difference.



Get the whole story


Betty, the love of my life

The Call

Hay Day of my Life

"The bro zone!" Like a brother

A Giant Heart

The tractor ride

Never Really Dated!

Shocked & Surprised

Good News

Finding an acorn

Scared my dad!

Send that hillbilly hiking

Who's chasing who?

Betty meets my grandmother

The longest summer ever

Reckless Redneck

Honeymoon

Separated for the first time

We are going to make it



Recordarás cuánto y con qué rapidez mi papá amó a Betty. A las pocas horas de conocerla, quería que me casara con ella. A menudo me decía, "bueno, ¡no todo el mundo está casado con una Betty!" pensó hasta el día de su muerte que ella era una de las mejores mujeres del planeta.


Cuando Betty estaba en la granja, era perfecta. Ella encajaba. Nunca parecía mirarnos con desprecio a pesar de que éramos tan diferentes, una chica de ciudad culta versus el campesino sureño. Betty no actuó con superioridad.


Para el desayuno del domingo antes de la iglesia, ¡siempre comíamos cereales servidos en "tazones para servir!" Ella nunca había visto algo así. La cantidad de comida preparada y servida la dejó alucinada.


Mi familia era muy ruidosa y bulliciosa. Fuertes discusiones, argumentos, risas y gente loca llenaban la casa, gente que iban y venían constantemente. Habían animales a los cuales se tenían que cuidar en todas partes, pollos, cerdos, vacas, caballos y conejos. Ordeñar la vaca a mano temprano en la mañana y luego al final del día. Betty encajaba.


Así que los Gardner, como los Clampett de "Beverly HillBillies", fueron invitados a visitar la casa de los Ferguson en Roswell, Georgia.


Teníamos muchos tractores, remolques, material y camiones. El auto nuevo, el último modelo de auto, no teníamos. Solo habíamos vivido en una casa con agua corriente y plomería interior por menos de tres años.


Llegamos a la casa de los Ferguson. Papá y yo estábamos en el mismo auto. Me dijo que lo sentía. Qué había cometido un error. No había forma de que pudiera casarme con una chica rica/adinerada como Betty. Nunca ganaría suficiente dinero para mantenerla maquillada.


Las lámparas de la casa lo dejaron alucinado. El tamaño de la casa nos dejó boquiabiertos. No importa el hecho que cuando pusieron la mesa, habían varios tenedores, cuchillos, cucharas y hasta platos para cada persona.


En nuestra casa, los "tenedores grandes", los llamábamos, eran para adultos. Los "tenedores pequeños" eran para niños. Nunca habíamos visto tantas piezas de platería. La gente del campo decían que era como si estuvieran presumiendo, dándose aires.


Ni siquiera consideren de que el dormitorio de Betty era del tamaño de la mitad de nuestra casa, y que tenía su propio baño privado, un closet y un vestidor separado.


No olvides que papá había dado un paso al frente y había construido una casa con plomería interior y un baño, pero más de uno era excesivo.


Fue demasiado. Papá dijo, me gusta ella, pero probablemente deberías salir de este matrimonio de cualquier forma como puedas. Nunca estarás a la altura de ellos.


Más tarde se retractaría cuando descubrió lo modesta que era Betty. Era trabajadora, humilde, amable, dulce, graciosa, y todo lo que había pensado primero. Pero sí nos dimos "un susto" allí en la reunión de los Ferguson y los Gardner.


La primera lección en que les llamo la atención es cuánto me amaba mi papá y quería lo mejor para mí en mi matrimonio. Todos los padres quieren eso. Si eres un adolescente y estás enojado con tus padres por interferir en tu búsqueda del amor verdadero, creo que estás cometiendo un gran error.


Para todos los padres, los desafío a comprender que ellos están comenzando a sentirse como adultos y que aún así desean tratarlos como niños. Entiéndelos y recuerda que estuviste en su lugar en algún momento. Ayúdalos en esta etapa de la vida. Ámalos.


La experiencia de Betty con más dinero y comodidad que yo no indicaba nada de su carácter. Ella estaba dispuesta y capaz de adaptarse y hacer lo que fuera necesario para que nosotros sirviéramos a Dios. Mire el que está considerando. ¿Qué tan egoísta es? ¿Qué tan exigente es? ¿Cuánto lloriquea? ¿Está dispuesto a ser un siervo?


La última pequeña lección es que puedes aprender y crecer sin importar lo que haya sucedido anteriormente o en tu pasado. No hay razón para permitir que su historia obstaculice su futuro. No es cómo te lastimaron o te criaron, sino cómo lo enfrentas lo que marcará la diferencia.



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